This is a succinct novella which opens with a bewitching poem, it seemed to me, rather than any kind of introduction or prologue and straight away the reader is enchanted and swept, spell like, into a paradox of prose that fuses contemporary, almost street, vernacular with whimsical insights that only a poet can compose. A maturer, wiser Cait wishes to atone and apologise for the misjudgements of her younger self as she remembers and shares with the reader her dilemma of becoming involved with two best friends, Rik and Stadd. The writer creates a palpable picture of 90’s Midlands, Birmingham to be exact, and, unflinchingly, recounts the details of her associations with these two guys who, apart, offer different relationship dynamics but if they were fused as a whole might even offer a perfect one! But, as we all know, relationships do not come with an instruction manual and there is a sense of Cait floundering through her own chaos.The basic premise is that Cait acknowledges from the persepctive of her older, more enlightened self that she did not behave in the best possible way when younger. She even describes herself as a monster. She wants to apologise to Stadd and she begins by conjuring his physical being before she begins her written reparation.
This is a poignant piece of work that I’m sure will resonate and evoke memory and regret in the hearts of many a reader. It’s a place many of us have been, considering the ‘what ifs?’ of life and knowing that that wonderful commodity - hindsight- is never there when you want it. The short story format is a perfect vehicle for this premise. To have drawn it out in a full length novel would have diluted the impact. Here, you feel Cait’s pain, her regrets and her realisations. It’s a touching piece of work, dark in places but honest in exploring the hurt people can exact upon each other when their desires yoyo from one need to another.
My thanks to Isabelle Kenyon at Fly on the Wall Press for a place upon the blog tour.
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