I've decided this has no place on a bookish blog so I have set up a separate blog for this diary. If you are interested you can find it here......
https://bookphacephoenix.blogspot.com
Social Distancing - Day 1
Funny, how a phrase so newly coined, becomes part of the common vernacular in such a relatively short space of time. And here am I practising it at the behest of my government. I am over 65 but not quite in the age bracket that suggests self isolation and high risk consideration. That's one of the first things that has struck me - a confusion between the two terms. Some are seeing social distance as social isolation. But I get that. I can see the confusion.
After the announcement yesterday my WhatsApp pinged into megabytes of busyness hitherto unexperienced. It hit me quite forcibly what a change this might make, not just to my life but the lives of my friends and family. Questions bounced back and forth; Can we go shopping? I've got a funeral to attend tomorrow? What about our classes? My Dad won't stop going out?
Today should have been my weekly Tai Chi class. But my teacher messaged me last night saying he would be cancelling the classes for 12 weeks. I felt a curious chill when I read that message. He's never cancelled, in all the years I've been going.
Prior to yesterday's ministerial announcement I had put in my prescription request to my doctor's surgery online a few days earlier. I found myself stressing about whether I could go and collect it! Would the Social Distancing Police stop me and send me home?! I had my story off pat. I needed the medication because if I ran out I would then go on to the high risk list for my condition if I contracted COVID-19. I needn't have worried. There were far fewer people about than usual. Still plenty of vehicles on the roads but crossing them was a doddle compared to pre social distancing.
The surgery was not as crowded as it might have been on a sunny Tuesday morning. I took my place in the queue which seemed to me to be the absolute antithesis of what we were trying to practice. Try as I might I couldn't manage the 6 feet between the next person and myself. When I reached the receptionist, who had difficulty finding the 'scrip; she asked me my name a couple of times, she warned me that in future I could no longer pick the prescription up at the surgery. I would have to nominate a pharmacy where it would be relayed electronically and I would pick it up there. She was worried that had already happened even though I hadn't nominated one. Then she realised she had been holding it in her hand the whole time.
I took it into the adjacent pharmacy which was, weirdly, more crowded than usual. It's a small store and there was a sense of people wishing to distance themselves but not having the room to do so. Clutching my bag of meds I started on my return journey which takes me past a branch of Waitrose. I thought I'd 'stock up'. Not panic buy I must emphasise. I have not and will not do that. Several of the items I wanted were sold out. No, not toilet rolls or hand sanitiser, those shelves were bare. I found myself buying goods I wouldn't normally consider - a packet of sesame and poppy seed crackers - they look delicious I might add! Assam tea. Seriously? Some Tofu wieners! Why? That sense of 'supposing I can't get anything to eat?' I know, it's irrational. I was so absorbed with my own maverick purchasing that I didn't really pay attention to others until I reached the check outs. Very crowded. I thought that perhaps people were doing a pre social distancing shop up. Trolleys were filled high but the atmosphere was peculiarly subdued. There was a latent anxiety as if people were worried that if they stayed out too much longer they'd catch 'IT'. Sadly there was no sense of camaraderie or pulling together. Everyone seemed to be in their own little bubbles. One customer said, quite, tersely, to the cashier, I see there are no toilet rolls, as if it was the checkout person's fault.
Now I'm home. Much as I might be on any given day when I'd gone to the surgery to pick up my 'scrip and popped into the supermarket on the way back. But it feels different. It feels angular, edgy, unnnerving. I can't settle to anything constructive. I've had a long textual exchange with my sister where she expressed the same feeling. And this is just the start!
I've no plans now to go anywhere. Although I haven't heard I'm presuming my other classes are cancelled. Two friends have respectively said they will see me 'on the other side' and 'at the end of the tunnel'. I have a friend, who is an author, hard at work on her third book but she expressed a sense of futility, about whether it mattered, this situation was triggering all sorts of adrenaline responses in her. She calls me her Ideal Reader and insists I must keep reading and blogging or she may as well disappear in a puff of smoke. I told her I'd continue to read and blog, no matter how badly or unsuccessfully if that's what it takes to keep her writing.
These are unprecedented times. History has had many of them. But I haven't! So I'm going to try and maintain and update this 'diary', for want of a better word, which will be a challenge as social distancing doesn't really suggest a dynamic of anticipation. But we'll see..........
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